Ben's Adventures : Too much cheer

Christmas is that time of year where you eat, drink and be merry. Or in my case drink far too much and ruin your meticulous fitness regime.

Fake -mas day at mine

Continuous days of drinking send you into a spiral and if it wasn't for the rugby bike ride out in the fresh air I would have gone a little stir crazy.

Now Christmas and New Years have come and gone and January is in full swing.

It feels like a long time ago when in fact it was only a couple of weeks that we were toasting festive cheer to one and all and consuming our bodyweight in pot and leftover turkey.

This year seemed to be even heavier than usual. It just so happened that everything that was planned were on consecutive days and nothing clashed.

In other words I was given a golden opportunity to enjoy myself and dink till I was singing.

On the 21st I held a fake-mas day at my house. 11 of my oldest friends crammed into my place where we put a garden patio table together with my dining table and made them bigger by laying planks of wood in the middle.

Fake-mas day at mine

The drinks flowed and the all played the game of hide my stuff or rearrange my ornaments and fiddle with my Budddhas.

It was the first time we had done all of that and everyone brought some item of food and drink with them. I did the meats while others provided the veg, deserts and starters. All in all it was successful but incredibly tiring. I seemed to be in and out of the kitchen all day.

When it came to finally go to bed I dropped onto the pillow and hit my head with a clunk.

Hidden in my pillow case were beer bottles. In fact beer, wine and spirit bottle were hidden all over the house ad it took me days to find them all.

The following day of Sunday 22nd December was the Ongar Rugby Club Christmas carols.

Basically we take over the Stag pub and sing from song sheets accompanied by a keyboard.

We sang festive numbers and rugby song. I even did a solo and while this was happening we drank the pub semi dry.

One of my mates then passed out so we decided to play human buakcroo with him. Somehow he didn’t wake up as a table, pot plants, guitar case and all sorts of jump was stacked up on him.

To make it even funnier he is a police officer and a certain daughter of one of our players drew phallic emblems all over him with pen!

The following day was a wine fest at my bootcamps xmas party held at a local manor house in the semi-permanent marquees erected outside.

Unfortunately it was one of the windiest days of the year and the marquee shook from side to side and rattled. The lighting rigs jiggled about and the singer on a rotating piano was drowned out.

Therefore we were all moved into the house after eating where we carried on devouring te all included wine that seemed to be bottomless.

I awoke the next day and it was Christmas Eve. Therefore that meant only one thing. The traditional Ongar pub time.

It’s the only time of the year certain people (myself included) all come back to Ongar and meet in the pub. It is like a reunion as we drink and be silly.

Christmas day was the usual and boxing day I detoxed!

The rugby xmas bike ride

The fun and games all stared again though on the 27^th. Because this was the day of another festive rugby tradition. Namely the bikeride.

The rugby bike rides happen in summer and around xmas time. This years one saw us find a wheelchair in a barn ad go down a hill on it and cycle from High Ongar all the way to West Hanningfield via a number of pubs.

Finally we arrived back in Fryerning and had a good old sing song at the Viper.

You arrive back in High Ongar close to 1am full of booze a little wobbly o our bike and covered in mud from the cross country stretches. It is all worth it and is a true festive highlight.

The next days were spent relaxing as soon it would be New Years Eve and this year we were taking Brentwood by storm.